Everything Happens for a Reason

And that will continue to be my mantra.

My housing situation worked out! I am almost officially going to be living with one of my SAI sisters in a beautiful apartment close to pretty much everything I need to be near! I'm a little further from work, but it's still like a 10 minute drive if I don't hit traffic. I say almost official because we haven't signed a lease, but we gave our applications, put down a deposit, and filled out a reservation form! So I'm very excited. Only thing left is to fight over who gets the big closet... UH OH! But everything will work out- no heads will roll because of a closet. :)

As for the whole my "best friend" no longer speaks to me thing... well that still hurts. Everyday I hope that it's the day he'll finally talk to me, say anything; even if it's to say he's angry with me... but so far no so luck. And I go back and forth between being upset with myself for seriously going through with the whole thing... and being angry that he doesn't want me in his life.

I mean, I'm constantly being told that I'm "too nice" and I let people walk all over me and that I need to make more selfish decisions because I need to think about myself over other people sometimes. So I finally did it- and I'm not completely bat shit crazy for doing it, right? Like telling a person that I feel as if I'm the only one trying to keep the friendship alive and that if they really want to be friends they can give it a shot... that's not really a lot to ask, is it? I don't think so. Any relationship, platonic or romantic, is a two way street if it's going to work.

So even though I feel upset, angry, unsure about the whole thing... I'll keep telling my self everything happens for a reason and hope that I understand that reason. Someday.